ALPHONSE (not his real name): Oh, what is he doing now?

GASTON (name changed to protect the guilty): Banging on that stupid box again.

ALPHONSE: How can he do that when we're here to be petted and given treats?

GASTON: I know, right? I'm feeling extra fluffy today, but all he cares about is that stupid box.

ALPHONSE: I'm gonna pee on that box the next time he goes into the tinkle room.

GASTON: Are you sure that's a good idea? The box is important to him.

ALPHONSE: More important than us?

GASTON: Good point. I'll join you.

ALPHONSE: I love it when a plan comes together! 

(NOTE: No computers were harmed in the taking of these images.)

Alphonse is not my real name. I don't have a real name, cuz Ira is too busy writing books to name me! Fortunately, like all cats, I have my own secret true name.  

I am Ira Nayman's other cat. Like Alphonse, I have not been properly named yet either. It doesn't matter. As if a simple name could possibly sum me up!

Books about cats in space? Count me in!

Joe Mahoney may not sell as many books as Stephen King. But he was there for me right from Day One, and that's good enough for me.

I'm pretty sure Joe Mahoney didn't set out to write the best books ever written. That happened entirely by accident.

 “To be completely honest, I've never read any Donovan Street Press books and probably never will because, first of all, I'm a dog, and second of all, I've been dead quite a while now.”

Paul Burns spends far too much time writing and not nearly enough time throwing a ball for me. Put down that pen, Paul, and THROW THE BALL FOR ME!!!!

We would like to register a complaint. We help Paul Burns write by chewing on his pen and lying on his keyboard. But he doesn't seem to appreciate it!

Sure can't wait for Paul Burn's next book The Dragon and the Druid to come out! But wait... sorry. What's a book again?

As a cat, I have never actually read Tom Mahoney's short story collection The Deer Yard and Other Stories, so I can't comment on that. But I can tell you this: Tom gives a mean belly rub. Oh yeah baby.

Joe Mahoney has never won the Stephen Leacock award. None of his books has ever won Canada Reads, a Hugo or Nebula Award, or the Pulitzer Prize. He's never won an Aurora Award, a Giller Prize, or any other damned literary award. He did, however, come second place in a chess tournament once.

I'm part beagle, and therefore a cousin of the most famous beagle of them all: Snoopy, who knows a thing or two about writing. And I can tell you that if Snoopy were here today, he'd tell you that he is a great admirer of... his own writing.

Donovan Street Press books are so good they make cats yearn to read.

There are hundreds of thousands of books published every single year. Why, then, should you choose a Donovan Street Press book over all those others? Because I said so, that's why.

They say there's no money in books anymore. It's simply not true. Why, I found a two dollar bill in one just the other day.

You can certainly buy Donovan Street Press books. And you can definitely read Donovan Street Press books. You might even enjoy Donovan Street Press books. But frankly, we'd much rather eat Donovan Street Press books.